Sunday, November 29, 2009

A father-daughter weekend

Tana hadn't been away from Jade over night since she was born six years and some change ago.  And Jade has made a lot of big steps these last few months with reading and swimming and growing and eating and eating.  So two nights in Monterey for Tana by herself seemed a lot more doable than even six months ago.  She took off on Friday.  It's Sunday.  It's over now.  Jade's at her friend's birthday party...I'm here with a half cold pacifico and my keyboard.

So while Tana's been in Monterey getting use to not having a blond shadow, Jade and I have been having a lot of fun.  Friday we started off taking the couch apart and building a fort.

 Then when we got bored of the fort I set up the camping tent in the family room and we slept downstairs staying up "late" watching movies and wrestling.

She went to a short playdate at her friend's house down the street the next day and I got to clean it all up and vacuum, dust, shower, blink...I can see how the grind gets snowballing the more you extend yourself out.  By the time Jade got back the whole place was cleaned up.

Cuddling that little dwarf, wrestling, bathing her and brushing her hair in the tub, just chilling with this little lady who used to be a small crying burrito, talking with her at night and generally just telling the schedule to go fuck itself for a weekend was so rewarding.  And though we really don't have any pictures to show from it, (other than these) that's sort of the point I's just another turn away from fear road.  Fear that these things must go documented.  And the documentation must be good and exciting so smile, not like this, like that, now stand on one foot, now do your best Christopher Walken impression, now standing backflip...oh crap, the lighting wasn't right, lets do it all over.  I'm not like that at all, but I like to keep my memory types balanced: try to write about events, take pictures, record movies and more now than ever just enjoy good times as they are happening and soak it in like a hippie because I know these days are fleeting.  She won't always be in kitten pajamas with a head of unruly hair, grin so big her gums are stretching.

I'm at a point with life where I'm going more day by day because stress (self inflicted) and genetics (no pill for this one) don't seem to be in my favor.  The men in my family don't seem to last long so I've figured out how to cheat thoughts of an early demise by throwing "death" at the bottom of my "to do list".  And since I do great with lists until the last few items or so, well it seems like the perfect place for death to take permanent residence.  It's sorted.  Got an empty check box next to it.  Bland font...lower case "d"...So now I don't have to think about it and I'm free to tackle the more pressing matters first in the hierarchy of my "list", like laying on the bed with Jade and singing a new song we made up, or drawing cat zombies or just drifting in and out of sleep in a tent in the family room on a windy night.

...And after I wrote the above blog, Jade and I ended up taking Bart to a toy store in San Francisco.  While we were waiting for a transfer I couldn't help but take our picture.  And to make it even more hypocritical I added some fun vintage FX I applied from my iphone.